In this world, what is truly valuable will not be noticed by people, but what is noticed often lacks value. Accordingly, for a person with his own value, if he knows how to minimize his own needs in order to preserve or expand his freedom, and try to avoid contact with his peers-because people in this world can’t avoid dealing with their peers, then this person will have real wisdom in life.
About solitude
Schopenhauer
I can enjoy myself, feel that everything is ready for me, and I can say that what I have is in me-this is the most important content of happiness. Therefore, Aristotle said a word worth repeating: Happiness belongs to those who are easily satisfied. . One of the reasons is that people can’t rely on others with certainty except themselves; Another reason is that the difficulties and inconveniences, troubles and dangers brought by society are countless and unavoidable.
The wrong way to get happiness is to pursue a life of debauchery, because we try to turn a miserable life into continuous pleasure, joy and enjoyment. In this way, disillusionment will follow; This kind of life is inevitably accompanied by lying and coaxing between people.
First of all, living among social groups inevitably requires people to accommodate and tolerate each other; Therefore, the bigger the party scene, the more likely it is to become boring. Only when a person is alone can he become himself completely. Anyone who doesn’t love solitude doesn’t love freedom, because Only when a person is alone is he free. Stiff and restrained are inevitably accompanied by social gatherings.
??Matt Black
Social gatherings require people to make sacrifices, and the more unique a person is, the harder it is for him to make such sacrifices. Therefore, a person’s escape, tolerance or love of solitude is just proportional to the value of this person. Because when you are alone, a poor man will feel all his pities, while a man with rich thoughts will only feel his rich thoughts. In a word: one can only feel oneself. Furthermore, the higher a person’s position in the level of nature, the more lonely he is, which is fundamental and inevitable. If a person’s physical loneliness and mental loneliness correspond to each other, it will be of great benefit to him. Otherwise,Frequent contacts with people who are different from you will disturb your mind and take away your self.And he won’t get any compensation for this loss.
Nature has set great differences in morality and intelligence between people, but society turns a blind eye to these differences and treats everyone equally. What’s more, the artificial differences caused by social status and rank have replaced the differences set by nature, and the former usually runs counter to the latter. Those who are treated badly by nature have benefited from this arrangement of social life and gained a good position, while those who are favored by nature have been devalued. Therefore, the latter kind of people always avoid social gatherings. And once every social gathering becomes crowded, mediocrity will dominate. The reason why social gatherings do harm to people with outstanding talents is that everyone has equal rights, which in turn leads people to put forward equal rights and requirements for everything, even though their talents are different. The next result is that people require others to admit that they have made equal achievements and contributions to society.
The so-called upper class admits a person’s advantages in other aspects, but only refuses to admit a person’s advantages in spirit and thought; They even resist this advantage. Society binds us to show endless patience with stupidity, stupidity and abnormality, but people with superior personality must ask others to forgive us; Or, he must hide his superiority, because the existence of superior and prominent spiritual thoughts itself constitutes damage to others, even though it has no intention to do so at all. Therefore, the disadvantage of the so-called "upper class" social gathering is not only that it provides us with people we can’t praise and love, but also that we are not allowed to present our true colors in our own natural way; On the contrary, it forces us to distort and shrink ourselves in order to cater to others. Deep conversation and thoughtful words can only belong to a gathering of people with rich thoughts. In general and mediocre social gatherings, people absolutely hate conversations full of ideas and knowledge. Therefore, in order to please others in this social situation, it is absolutely necessary to make yourself mediocre and narrow. Therefore,We can only reject most of ourselves in order to be similar and congenial to others. Of course, for this price, we gained the favor of others. But the more valuable a person is, the more he will find that it is not worth the loss. This is simply a loss-making business. People are usually unable to pay their debts; They impose boredom, annoyance, unhappiness and self-denial on us, but they can’t make up for it. Most social gatherings are such essence. Give up this social gathering in exchange for solitude, then we have made a shrewd business.
In addition, because the advantages of real spiritual thought are not seen in social gatherings, and it is really rare, in order to replace it, people have adopted something false, secular and conventional, based on quite random principles as a kind of superior performance-it is traditionally conveyed in advanced social circles and can be changed at any time just like argot. This is what people call fashion or fashion. However, once this advantage collides with the real advantage of people, it immediately shows its weakness. Moreover, "when fashion enters, common sense will retire."
Generally speaking, One can only achieve the perfect harmony with oneself, not with friends or spouses. Because the differences in personality and temper between people will certainly bring some disharmony, even if these disharmonies are only quite slight. Therefore, complete and true inner peace-this is the supreme favor after health in this world-can only be found when a person is alone; To maintain this state of mind for a long time, it is only necessary to live in seclusion.
??Matt Black
The first lesson that young people learn is to bear loneliness, because loneliness is the source of happiness and happiness. According to this, only those who rely on themselves and can realize themselves from everything are the people in the best situation. So Cicero said, "It is impossible for a person who relies entirely on himself and everything that belongs to him exists in himself."
In addition,The more a person has, the less others can give him. It is this sufficient feeling that makes people with intrinsic rich value unwilling to make necessary and obvious sacrifices for the sake of communication with others; They are even less likely to actively seek these contacts and deny themselves. In contrast, because of their lack of inner self, mediocre people like to associate with others and indulge others, because it is easier for them to tolerate others than themselves. Besides, in this world,What is truly valuable will not be noticed by people, but what is noticed often lacks value. Every valuable and outstanding person would rather retire and retire-this is the proof and result of the above facts. Accordingly, for a person with his own value, if he knows how to minimize his own needs in order to preserve or expand his freedom, and try to avoid contact with his peers-because people in this world can’t avoid dealing with their peers, then this person will have real wisdom in life.
What motivates people to engage in social interaction is that people lack the ability to endure loneliness-in loneliness, people can’t stand themselves. Their inner boredom and emptiness drive them to be keen on interacting with people and traveling and sightseeing in other places. Their spiritual thoughts lack a kind of elasticity, so they can’t move on their own; Therefore, they try to improve their spirits by drinking, and many people become alcoholics in this way. For the same reason, these people need constant stimulation from the outside-or, more accurately, they can get the strongest stimulation through contact with people of the same kind. Without this kind of stimulation, their spiritual thoughts will sink under the heavy burden and eventually fall into a tragic muddle. We can also say that all these people have only a small part of the concept of human nature. Therefore, they need many supplements from others. Only in this way, can they get the complete consciousness of human beings to some extent.
In this sense, we can compare mediocre people to those Russian horn instruments. Each horn can only emit a single tone, and the required horns can be properly put together to play music. The spirit and temperament of the public are monotonous and boring, just like those animal horn instruments that can only make a single tone. Indeed,Many people seem to have only a certain unchangeable opinion all their lives, and beyond that, they have no ability to generate other ideas and thoughts. This not only explains why these people are so boring, but also explains why they are so keen on interacting with people, especially enjoying activities in groups. This is the social nature of human beings. People’s monotonous personality makes them unable to stand themselves. "Stupid people suffer from the fatigue caused by their stupidity." Only when people come together and unite can they make a difference. This situation is the same as bringing together Russian horn instruments to play music.
However, a person with rich thoughts and minds can be compared with a musician who can play music alone; Or, we can compare him to a piano. The piano itself is a small band. Similarly, such a person is a miniature world. Others need to be complemented by each other, but the individual mind consciousness of this kind of person is already a unity. Just like the piano, he is not a member of a symphony orchestra. He is more suitable to play alone. If he really needs to play with others, then he can only be the lead voice accompanied by other instruments, just like the piano in the band. Or, he sets the tone of vocal music like a piano. Those who love social interaction can draw a rule from my metaphor: the quality lacking in social interaction can only be compensated by the number of people to some extent. It is enough to have a thoughtful companion. But if it is difficult to find others except mediocre people, then it is a good idea to make up a certain number of these people, because we will still gain something through their respective differences and mutual supplementation-using the metaphor of animal horn instruments.
May God grant us patience! Similarly, due to the poverty and emptiness in people’s hearts, when those better people form a group for some noble ideal goals, they almost invariably encounter such a result: among that huge crowd-they are like all-pervasive bacteria, ready to seize any opportunity to drive away boredom-there are always some people who blend in or forcibly break into this group. Before long, this group was either destroyed or tampered with, which ran counter to the original intention of forming this group.
??Matt Black
In addition, people’s social life can be regarded as spiritual heating between people, which is similar to people crowding together to keep warm in cold weather. However, people with extraordinary ideological enthusiasm do not need to be crowded with others. A person’s enthusiasm for social interaction is roughly inversely proportional to the value of his spiritual thoughts. This sentence, "he doesn’t like to associate with people", is almost equivalent to saying "he is a man with great qualities"
Loneliness brings double benefits to a person with excellent spiritual endowment: first, he can keep company with himself; Second, he doesn’t need to be with others. The second point is precious, especially when we remember the bondage, annoyance and even danger that social communication means. Rabuye said: "We suffer all the misfortunes because we can’t be alone." . Being keen on interacting with people is actually a very dangerous tendency, because most of the people we deal with are morally deficient, mentally retarded or abnormal. Not sociable is actually not rare for these people. It is indeed a great blessing for a person to have enough connotation to have no need to associate with others at all; Because almost all the pain comes from interacting with people, our peace of mind-which is second only to our health-will be destroyed at any time because of interacting with people.
Without enough solitude, we can’t get a peaceful state of mind. Bernarden de Saint-Pierre’s words hit the nail on the head and said beautifully: "Moderation in dealing with people will make our hearts calm." Therefore, if anyone can adapt to solitude at an early age and likes solitude, he will get a gold mine. Of course, not everyone can do this. Just as people are driven together by lack from the beginning, once the lack is solved, boredom will also drive people together. If people are not driven away by lack and boredom, they may be alone, although the reason is that everyone thinks they are important and even unique, and living alone is just suitable for people who evaluate themselves like this; Because living in a crowded and complicated world, it will become difficult and constrained, and its importance and uniqueness will be greatly reduced. In this sense, solitude is even a natural state of life suitable for everyone: it enables everyone to enjoy the original happiness that is consistent with their own nature like Adam.
But of course, Adam has no father or mother! Therefore, in another sense, being alone is unnatural for people. At least, when people come to this world, they find that they are not alone. He has parents, brothers and sisters, so he is a member of the group. Accordingly, the love of solitude is not an original tendency, but a product of experience and consideration; Moreover, the love of solitude is formed with the progress of our spiritual ability and the increase of our age. So,Generally speaking, a person’s desire for social interaction is inversely proportional to his age. Young children will cry in horror and pain when they stay alone for a while. Leaving a boy alone is a severe punishment for him. It is easy for young people to get together. Only those young people with noble temperament sometimes try to be alone, but it is still difficult to stay alone for a day. But adults can do this easily. They have been alone for a long time. Moreover, the older he gets, the more he can be alone. Finally, the old people who arrived in seventy years of age no longer need the pleasure and entertainment in life, or they are completely indifferent, and all their peers have passed away. For this kind of old people, being alone is just what they need.
Loneliness is the doomed fate of people with outstanding spirit: they sometimes boo at this fate, but they always choose loneliness as the lesser of two evils. With the growth of age, it becomes easier and more natural to "let yourself follow reason" in this respect. When a person reaches the age of 60, his desire for loneliness is really natural, and even becomes an instinct, because at this age, all factors are combined to help form the desire for loneliness. The strong love for socializing, that is, the love for women and the desire for sex, has cooled down. In fact, The state of no sexual desire in old age lays the foundation for a person to achieve some kind of self-sufficiency; Self-sufficiency will gradually suck away people’s desire for social interaction. We gave up all kinds of illusions and foolish behaviors; The active and busy life is mostly over by this time. At this time, there is nothing to look forward to, and there are no more plans and plans. There are not many generations left to which we belong. The people around us belong to a new and unfamiliar generation, and we have become an objective and truly lonely existence.
??Matt Black
Time goes by more and more quickly, and we are more willing to devote our time at this moment to spiritual thinking. Because if our minds remain energetic, the rich knowledge and experience we have accumulated, the gradually improved ideas and opinions, and the superb skills we have mastered in using our own abilities make our research on things easier and more interesting than before. Countless things that used to be foggy in the clouds and mountains are now clearly understood by us; Things have come to the bottom, and we feel that we have some kind of complete advantage. Rich experience makes us stop expecting too much of others, because, on the whole, others are not all people who will gain our goodwill and praise after we get to know each other better. On the contrary, we know that apart from some rare and lucky examples, we will encounter nothing but specimens of human defects. We’d better stay away from these people. Therefore, we are no longer confused by the usual illusions in life. We can judge a person from the outside; We are not eager to have deeper contact with such people. Finally, The habit of being apart from others and keeping company with ourselves has become our second nature, especially when loneliness has been our friend since youth.
As Horace said, "There is nothing perfect in this world". An Indian proverb says, "There is no lotus without a stalk". Therefore, although solitude has many advantages, it also has a little inconvenience and trouble. Among the many inconveniences of lonely life, one disadvantage is not easy to attract our attention: just as staying indoors continuously will make our bodies sensitive to the influence of the outside world, a small cold wind will cause our bodies to get sick; Similarly, Living alone for a long time will make our emotions extremely sensitive. Some insignificant things, words, and even other people’s expressions and eyes will make us feel uneasy, hurt and painful. In contrast, a person who lives in the hustle and bustle of JaeHee will not notice these trivial things at all.
If a person chooses a lonely life out of justified disgust and fear, then he can’t stand the dark side of lonely life for a long time, especially when he is young. My advice to such people is to form such a habit: Bring part of loneliness into the social crowd and learn to maintain a certain degree of loneliness in the crowd. In this way, he will learn not to tell others what he thinks anytime and anywhere at once; In addition, never take what others say too seriously. He can’t expect too much from others, either morally or ideologically. He should cultivate an indifferent and indifferent attitude towards other people’s views, because this is the most practical means to cultivate commendable tolerance. Although he lives among people, he can’t be a part of them completely; He should keep in touch with others as objectively as possible. This will make him avoid too close contact with the social crowd, which will protect himself from slander and insult by others. In this sense, we can compare the social crowd to a fire. Wise people know how to keep a distance from the fire when heating, instead of being too close to the fire like fools. After burning himself, the latter plunged into the cold loneliness and complained loudly about the burning flame.
This article is excerpted from
The Wisdom of Life
Author: [Germany] Schopenhauer
Translator: Wei Qichang
Publishing House: Shanghai People’s Publishing House
Publication year: April 2014
Edit | Barbarossa
Editor | Wei Bingxin
